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Not being part of a family in a family-run business can make it more difficult for you—especially in smaller companies with several family members. In bigger companies, the influence of family members will generally be much diluted by the larger workforce and management team. Also, in a corporation, a commitment to shareholders and public record-keeping and reporting requirements will usually provide pressure to make sure family members are qualified and competent in their positions.

But what happens when you work with a group of family members who have more power than you in a smaller company, and you aren't part of the family? What can you do apart from leaving the company and finding another job? That's what one reader—let's call him Paul— wanted to know in asking for my views on nepotism.

Paul explained that he worked as a collection agent in a small collection agency with a dozen employees, where his immediate supervisor, David, and the head of operations, John, were brothers, and the president of the company, Frank, was their uncle. Before David got his job as supervisor, his father held the position until he retired a year earlier, and that's why David got the job after he graduated from college as a business major several years earlier. However, while Paul felt David did a good job and was very much qualified, he felt John, who also joined the company after college two years earlier did not do a good job and was not well qualified for his position. Though John's job was making sure the computer software, payroll system, and everyday administrative procedures worked effectively, foul-ups were frequent. Yet, whenever they happened, David commonly came to his brother John's defense, after which John worked on fixing the problem he had created by his errors.

Besides Paul, many other agents complained about John's work to each other, but they were afraid to say anything to David, because of his close relationship with his brother and others in the family, who handled various administrative tasks, such as payroll and advertising to get clients. While the agents, who worked on a draw and commission were not family members, the others who formed the power center of the company were. They felt David might even fire them to keep them quiet if they complained—or perhaps reduce their earnings by giving them harder leads for collection cases, given their commission against a draw arrangement. Paul thought the whole system was quite unfair.

What Should Paul Do?

Here are some possibilities. In Paul's place, what would you do and why? What do you think the outcomes of these different options would be?

• Seek to become closer to David, the brother-supervisor, so you will become like one of the family, like David.

• Seek to do even more to help John, so John will realize how much he needs your help, which can lead to more advancement as John moves ahead.

• Talk to David, the supervisor, about the problem and seek to work out a solution that will result in positive changes for everyone.

• Keep a chronology of what John is doing wrong to use in a discussion with David, the supervisor, or outside legal help.

• Talk to John and offer to help him improve his own performance.

• Other?

What should Paul do? Unfortunately, the system is unfair. But if you work in a small privately held company as a lower level or front-line employee, you may not be able to do much to make the overall system more just, unless the poorly performing family-member employee messes up so badly that he or she becomes a clear embarrassment and detriment to the company. Then, the family members are likely to move that person to a less vital position or even out of the company to reduce the threat. But barring such a clear-cut disaster, the incompetent family member will often continue to bumble along, perhaps protected by one or more other family members who cover for him, help him do the job, and clean up occasional mistakes. They may see this as helping out a weaker or disabled family member. This way, they get the work done, even though not in the most effective or efficient way, and non-family members may feel this is not a fair arrangement. Thus, if you are not in the family, adjusting to that situation may come with the territory of working in this particular company, even if you think this is not the best or fairest way to do the work.

One approach that might at least help you feel better about the situation is to try to understand the reasons other family members are sticking up for someone like John and learn to better accept this. This way you feel more comfortable working there, even if the situation seems unfair.

Alternatively, if this unqualified person is seriously hampering operations and upsetting many people by a lack of ability, maybe Paul— or anyone facing such a problem—could engage in various strategies to lead to change without losing a job for speaking up. The best option will depend on the particular circumstances and personalities involved.

For example, Paul might have a private meeting with David, his supervisor, to make him more aware of the extent of the problem and high level of dissatisfaction among other employees. He might also offer some suggestions for resolving the problem diplomatically, such as by providing John with additional training to do a better job. This greater awareness might help to produce positive changes, since David might view his role as occasionally coming to bat for his brother and may not recognize how serious the problem is. Once he does, he might then make effective changes. Thus, to promote awareness, Paul might start a chronology in which he keeps track of when John does something wrong that results in inefficiencies or losses to the company. Also, since there is strength and safety in numbers, Paul might get others who agree there is a problem to keep track as well.

Then, with the problem documented, Paul is in a better position to discuss the problem with his supervisor. He might also find it persuasive to approach the supervisor with one of his co-workers who is similarly upset by John's behavior. This way, once David sees how widespread the feelings against John are, he will likely take them more seriously—and then his commitment to the company and his staffers may well outtrump his commitment to protect his less competent brother.

Finally, another approach might be to consider why John is acting incompetently and what you or others might do to do to improve his performance. For example, maybe Paul has information to help John do a better job. Or maybe Paul could give John feedback on the weaknesses in the system he has set up (such as the difficulty of tracking a debtor's collections history), so John could figure out how to improve the system. In turn, providing this assistance might help to ingratiate Paul not only with John but also with others in the family, thereby improving his ability to move ahead or earn more money, despite a commission-based payment arrangement in a family-run firm.

In short, if you are faced with an unqualified family member in a family-run workplace, want to stay there, and can't overcome that family wall of protection, think of how you might help and join them. Be solutions-oriented and find ways to be supportive. The result might be that you not only solve the problem, but also help yourself get ahead, despite the bias toward hiring and promoting family members in the firm.

Conclusion

• Even if life and work are unfair, think how best to play the hand you've got.

• Don't just gripe about a problem as a group; by joining together, maybe you can solve the problem as a group.

• If you can help a family member in trouble, maybe the family will help you, too.

• Think of how you can contribute to the solution, by being solutions oriented. If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem, as they say.